The Open Toed Shoe Pledge
As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the Rules when wearing sandals and other open-toe shoes:
I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. The sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.
I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.
I will sand down any build-up of rough skin before it turns hard and yellow. I will shave the hairs off my big toe (yes, you do have hair on your big toe).
I will not wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.
If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.
I will not live in corn denial; rather I will go to my good friend Dr. Scholl if my toes need him.
I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell and begin to look like Vienna sausages.
I will promise if I wear flip flops that I will ensure that they actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I will swear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.
I will promise to go to my local nail salon at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are worth every penny of the $25 or $30).
I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear as few things are tackier than dirty white sandals.
I will promise to do my best to display my beautiful feet only in their full feminine glory... in a pair of gorgeous strappy sandals whenever possible.